Saturday, July 29, 2006

Thank you Friendly Neighbor



I was starting to feel sorry for myself for a minute because of my lack of husband (working nights, sleeping days), large & cumbersome size & lack of air to breathe & a wild toddler who screams to be taken outside for hours of fun, where it is HOT. And, my helpful and sweet 6 year old is on his first trip alone with his grandparents. Believe me, I`ve had much worse problems, but this weekend was looking a little challenging. And then... my friendly neighbor and great friend sent me a festival of flavor from the farmers market! What a great way to start my Saturday.

Friday, July 28, 2006



I had to steal this from the Post today because the reviewer, Stephen Hunter, really describes the utter awesomeness of the original stars of Miami Vice. I LOVE Miami Vice & I`m not that excited about the new movie. It seems like its an updated version of the most perfect show ever, but with some music from nowadays and not the fabulous Smugglers` Blues Glenn Frye & Don Henley type of stuff that I like so much.

"But the worst news about "Miami Vice" is that Colin Farrell and Jamie Foxx, replacing Don Johnson and Philip Michael Thomas in the key roles, don't hold a candle, a flashlight, a freakin' match to the original guys. Though they seem so two-decades-ago, Crockett in his pastels and sockless white loafers and Tubbs with his surly mumbling and ever-buttoned double-breasted jacket and tie -- no matter the weather or the incoming -- the boys were at once McQueen-chilled, hipster-chic and existential-exotic. They were uranium-depleted cool. Johnson's Crockett had a fallen Southern prince aspect to him as a former Florida wide receiver ruined by two years in Nam, a failed marriage, a weakness for women and booze, but underneath it: good-old-boy true grit. Tubbs, by contrast, was a black New Yorker with dead eyes and a drop-dead smile and a kind of musical sensibility. He represented the Afro-Caribbean presence that came to dominate Miami in the '80s and turn it into the American Casablanca. He could mix with the homeboys, the Haitians, the wraiths of color that brought their potions to a city on a bay that is never confused with Baltimore."

Off to the lake



My firstborn son is going on vacation with his grandparents, without us. I miss him already and he leaves this afternoon. I know he will have a wonderful time and I wish we were going too, but alas, I am way too big and scarily pregnant for a 15 hour drive! He will swim, help with cooking, play with his uncle, and explore in the dark with his flashlight, among many other great things.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Very Grateful Wednesday





I am extremely grateful today for my 2 friendly neighbors (and very good friends) who threw a beautiful baby shower for me on Sunday. It was on the top floor of an Arlington apt building, with gorgeous flowers and great food. I was so happy & so was the dear husband. Kids made a fun space for themselves, games were played and it was such a super group of people, mostly our neighborhood cocktail hour crew. It hasn`t been easy for me to even attend baby showers in the last 4 years, but it was healing and wonderful to celebrate this new little person arriving in 3 weeks(!!!!). To the ladies that planned this party, THANK YOU!

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Trying to be grateful

OK, not feeling very motivated right now. I`m way bigger than I hoped to be and I`m not dealing with it very well & I just feel so out of breath. Let`s still find things to be grateful for:

1. I`m grateful to my husband for having the patience that he does and having many mad skillz to do all kinds of things, like helping a man in the middle of a grand mal seizure yesterday. I hope that guy is Ok today.

2. I`m grateful to God that I`ve gotten this far with little Joaquin and he grows and moves well. I may be big, but so is he and I have to be substantial to support him, now & when I make milk for him. I`m also pretty thankful for the new experience of great skin, hair & nails this time.

3. I`m grateful this week that we had another good LLL meeting and lots of mamas were there asking tough questions. It was exhausting but those ladies are inspiring.

Saturday, July 15, 2006

The most beautiful desert in the world, in Saudi Arabia


I spent a lot of time here when I was a kid and I love this landscape. It was like the calm before the storm in the Middle East when we lived there in the late 70`s.

Friday, July 14, 2006

Warning, mature themes

One of the scariest movies I`ve ever seen is "Candyman" and what makes it scary to me is that the Candyman can kill you anywhere no matter how many people are around you. Nobody can help you. Losing a baby to shoulder dystocia is just like that. Everybody was tested and everybody failed, nobody could save my son and lots of people tried. It looked to me like there were more than 30 people in the ER alone and none of them could help Alistair in time. This little boy I`m carrying now feels big like his brother and every day I feel more Ok with the choice (or lack thereof) to have him born surgically.


With the urge to organize the house kicking in, where should I start? Oh, maybe I`ll make my dear husband a Mojito station in the kitchen so the counters aren`t covered in mint & lime. Priorities!

A photo of a 6 year old`s favorite spot next to his house, taken by the 6 year old himself



and both boys dressed alike by Papi, complete with Pirates of the Caribbean hats on.

Friday, July 07, 2006

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

Tiny Boy # 4 has a delivery date!

OK, so teeny will arrive on August 16th at 12 noon!

Saturday, July 01, 2006





The boyz, happy & handsome on a Sunday morning.
Father & son hanging out on the floor.

mama!

My deck in the Shire, just pretty & then cleaned up & prettier



Friday, June 30, 2006

Another rock star!



Its been awhile since I posted a photo of one of my favorite men with serious star quality, but I just heard a Ziggy song on XM & remembered how much love I had for him in high school. I got made fun of by the Husker Du & Camper Van fans who thought liking Ziggy was just weak. But he has some gifts from his dad & then he has a powerful voice & a spiritual strength all his own. Love you Ziggy!

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

Grateful one day early this time...



Getting bigger every day it seems like. I honestly have no complaints right now, the 3rd trimester is usually good to me. No heartburn, swelling, headaches, high blood pressure, roid rage, ha ha . None of it. I just hate bending over a lot & I have one very active little boy in here. I`m also one big mama. I am grateful to still be here, growing & glowing. I have the joy of another surgical delivery to look forward to, but I don`t think there`s any other way and I`m Ok with that.

I`m grateful that my 2 friends who both had their water break at 33 weeks are both doing so well. One is still on hospital bedrest and holding tight to grow a bigger stronger baby girl. The other one had her baby girl after 5 days on hospital bedrest & as she has been through a lot in the past I`m just so glad she`s safely here. Thank God!

Monday, June 26, 2006



a boy having a great time with his cousins on a rainy Saturday in June.

Thursday, June 15, 2006

"Breastfeed or Else" article in NYT

The NYT had a great article about breastfeeding and how to have a public health campaign to encourage more moms to nurse longer. On Bloggingbaby.com, I stole this comment and I`ll give credit to Amanda for writing it. She`s a mom who both bottle & breastfed & I think this is so well said:

"Many moms, on the other hand, do not make informed decisions and are unaware that formula carries risks. Everyone things that breast is best or breast milk has benefits but that's all hogwash. Breastmilk does not carry benefits. It is the biological norm. It does what it is supposed to do. Any deviation from that carries risks. Now the extent to how great those risks are is debatable even among the medical community and each family has to do their own risk/benefit analysis when deciding whether or not to breastfeed because it IS a choice. No amount of lactivism will take the choice out of it."

Thursday, June 08, 2006




My face is pregnant too!
And one cute little creature.

Grateful Wednesday on Thursday again.

I am just happy to be right here, right now, and healthy. I am grateful to be alive and thankful that I have instincts to tell me when things are wrong.

Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Grateful Wednesday

1. I`m grateful that both my mom & brother got new jobs that they both wanted very much. I am very grateful that my brother will be moving closer so we will get to see him more often, Cool Uncle Mike.

2. I`m grateful to my husband for being there for me as I came home stressed from my doctor`s appointment. She doesn`t have any faith (in me, in things going well) and he pointed that out and now I need a new doctor.

3. I`m grateful to read this on another blog & it really sums up how I feel right now about being a stay at home mama, its hard, working is hard & being at home is hard, its just hard either way.: "Now I stay home and am experiencing the wrath of the full time toddler. It is a bittersweet roller coaster of preciousness and exhaustion. I love it and sometimes fear it. I get to see my children when they get home from school. We spend the afternoons together and I never have to wince when I hear my cell phone ring, for fear an irate client is calling."

Tuesday, May 30, 2006


Now this is a good man, he and Gwen Stefani just had a baby, should he be bringing home diapers or food for mama? No, a case of champagne is what he carries out of the store. Note to my husband; in a few months you can do this too!

Thursday, May 25, 2006

Kindergarten Circus






What an awesome Strong Man

mini Vacay




A beautiful cool day in Ft. Ward park in Alexandria with the boys favorite picnic friend, Lucy.

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Grateful Thursday

since I missed Wednesday, here we are:

I am grateful for another jampacked La Leche meeting and the fulfillment of helping new mamas in the beginning of their mothering.

I am grateful to the mamas that are brave enough to come to the meetings in the first place, they teach me so much about being open to change, being willing to learn and unafraid to face new situations. I wasn`t that brave in the beginning of mamahood.

Grateful to God for keeping this little boy healthy in here.

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Happy Mother`s Day


Happy Mother`s Day to all the mamas!

Friday, May 12, 2006

Green Springy





What a beautiful Friday morning in May. Only one silent tantrum from Karl!

Green Spring Gardens, just Creature & mama




2 great plants, a mammoth elephant ear & a weird blue green fingernail looking thing from South America.

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Grateful Wednesday already!

Let`s see, I`m grateful for this beautiful time of year and the friendly neighbors and good friends I get to be with outside in the wide world.

I`m grateful to have my parents and I appreciate being near them every day.

That`s all I can do for now so I don`t get too corny.

Saturday, May 06, 2006

Alistair`s birthday




This is what we do on our son`s birthday. Only other bereaved parents really like to see what other grieving families do, but since I have a place in the computer to put whatever I want, I`ll remember my son here today, on the day he was born 4 years ago.

Alistair, we miss you.

Today would be/is my second son`s 4th birthday. Today it just made me mad having to go to the cemetery instead of having a group of 4 year olds here to trash the house and eat cake. It gets easier in that you don`t cry every day, but you always notice someone missing.

Another blog for a newly bereaved mom of a baby boy had this quote on it. A lady named Tabor said this: (hope she doesn`t mind)
"This is a big cruel mountain to climb, but I think it will strengthen you more and the view at the top will be much better than the view that we have...those of us who muddle through each day with far less understanding."
It is a different world that bereaved parents live in, but in some ways its wonderful because we can cut through the crap easier, we know what`s important, and good times feel great, because we know how the worst thing feels.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006





2 views of a Columbine, since their short lived glory days are right now & one view of a mama who is very grateful to her husband for making these days of exploring with little boyz possible.

About Me

My photo
I'm just a mom in the world. A crunchy Catholic mama of 6 trying to make sense of it all and stay positive. 5 boys here & 1 in heaven. One awesome man who I get to grow old with. I help new moms breastfeed. I`m happy. I don`t go to shows or dance clubs every night but I would if I could. Where`s the nanny? When I see her she`s SO fired! One of my boys is super sweet and sensitive, another one is a holy terror. I learn a ton from all of them daily. Like Nigella says, as any parent of small children knows,there comes a point in the day where you can`t go any further without a drink! I love cocktail hour. I`d like nothing more than to be with my family and some good friends surrounded by tropical plants drinking a margarita listening to the Eagles. I don`t care about trendy, I like that grungy 70`s vibe.